Originally Written: March 31, 2021
Gender roles have always been the topic of many conversations; often, they are cited as the reason why feminism is considered invalid. The most common argument stems from the fact that females are traditionally the ones who give birth, and so it is only logical that we should stay home to take care of the children. This was seen quite often by the opponents of the Equal Rights Amendment in the 1970's. However, recent studies have found that these gender roles are only forced upon us and not what some might think of as "scientific."
Source: Vogue
Of course, gender roles affect everyone, not just women. Not so long ago, Harry Styles, a former member of the band One Direction, wore a dress on the cover of Vogue. Soon after, conservative author Candace Owens responded with her infamous "Bring back manly men" comment. This quote actually revealed quite a lot about society's constructs and how that influences us to think. The truth is, the concepts of "feminine" and "masculine" are, well, mere concepts. They shouldn't limit anyone from wearing what they want or expressing themselves in some medium. Men wearing pants and women wearing skirts was an aspect of our history, but that doesn't mean that we have to continue the tradition. It's the same thing as how people considered slavery a custom, but we now know that it an intolerable act. Now, it's just time for us to realize that gender is a fluid thing and the lines between "masculine" and "feminine" are hard to define.
However, society has constantly tried to fit each of us into the defining masculine versus feminine frame, claiming each has its own characteristics. The fact that most women can get pregnant (although it's not always just women), has led many to believe that women belonged in the home, and stated that it was where they were for a long time anyway. In reality, women were not always constrained to the home, even in our prehistoric times. Recently, new evidence suggested that women were not only gatherers, but also hunters and warriors. Some excavated skeletons found women with sharp metal tools, hinting at the fact that women were not always doing "gentler" activities. It just proves that forcing people into the supposed gender roles do not really have a basis; it is only something that society has come up with through the years. Again, as much as tradition is nice to acknowledge, we shouldn't continue a tradition that systematically harms and degrades a certain group of people.
Some of the most common gender roles in our society today are very limiting and prevent gender equity from progressing. For one, women are still seen as having less power than men are, as seen in the proliferating amount of sexual assault cases. Women reverting to the home even after they've secured a career for themselves is not uncommon. In fact, a study done in South Korea revealed that while the majority of high school and college graduates are women, they don't make it further into the workplace. Why? As soon as they have a decent amount of education, they are forced into their "positions" in society as mothers and wives. While being a housewife isn't a sin, this instance is only emphasizing how we tend to pritoritize the man's job over the woman's. On the other hand, men's gender roles are also defining. Men do not need to always be the breadwinner of the family. This idea of men primarily providing for their family has lasted for centuries, yet there is no scientific reasoning as to why this idea must be prolonged any further. This gets to a point where men who do not make "sufficient" money for the family are failures, and given a bad reputation amongst their friends and family. Additionally, men who are considered "feminine" and apply makeup or wear non-traditional clothing are stigmatized heavily, even more than masculine females. As a matter of fact, females playing with "male" toys are considered cool, even "out-of-the-box," yet when males play with "female" toys, they are shamed. It restricts men to keep what we call masculinity because we can't stand to see a man appearing weaker and lowering themselves to a woman's status.
Every time I see a family on TV where the man helps care for the children and recognizes that the wife has her own life outside of the house, it's very touching. Almost. We need to understand that men taking care of the children and doing house chores do not make them a disgrace, nor is this a very high standard for husbands. This is something all men need to do, and doing so doesn't make them any less "manly." Together, by bringing awareness to harmful gender roles inside and outside the home, we can change the norms to make life choices freer for everyone. Yet another important factor is this can eradicate the gender binary as well. Granted, changing people's mindsets are more than difficult, and it's only true that we can't always come to a consensus on everything immediately. However, small change can occur if we stop normalizing toxic masculinity and eliminate gender as a factor for who gets to work and who helps care for the children. All in all, gender roles, as historic as they are, do not allow us to do what we all want to do. It's time to move on from that fixed mindset to viewing people beyond their genders and sexes.
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